The Architect’s Dilemma: How Ethical Business Alignment Saved My Business

I recently did some deep self-reflection on my past and present, and I made a discovery that changed everything.

For years, I thought I was not good at sales. I assumed I lacked the "hustle" gene or the extroverted charisma required to close deals. But as it turns out, I didn't have a skill problem. I had an Ethical Business Alignment problem.

As I am in a transition from being an e-commerce business owner to focusing on helping other businesses, I have had to face an entirely different set of challenges. Landing those first few clients is harder than I expected, creating a daily emotional roller-coaster. But I realised this struggle wasn't just about market dynamics; it was internal.

For a long time, I was procrastinating on outreach. I did everything to distract myself from finding more potential clients. I found excuses not to "reach out" and not to "close." I honestly thought I was self-sabotaging.

The reality? My inner conflict was jeopardising my business.

I was trying to sell to everyone because I was afraid of not making it. But because I value "People and Planet," trying to sell to companies that didn't share those values felt mentally and physically wrong. My subconscious was hitting the brakes.

This is the story of how I stopped fighting that resistance and used it to build a new framework for my work.

Beyond the Warehouse: The Mind of a Systems Architect

To understand why this conflict existed, I had to look at how my mind works. I am a Systems Architect.

For a long time, I let people define me by just one slice of my history—my time in logistics at the Coca-Cola HBC Ltd. While it is true that I spent years managing warehouse operations, that is not the full picture. It is only one layer of the foundation.

My background is a tapestry of complex systems. I have managed the delicate "user experience" of visitor flows at the Holburne Museum in Bath. I have built and run my own conscious e-commerce brand, Shaveman’s, navigating the chaotic reality of Direct-to-Consumer (D2C) retail. I have consulted on digital infrastructure and funnel mechanics.

The common thread across all these roles, from the warehouse floor to the digital storefront, is that I do not see isolated tasks. I see connected ecosystems. I see where the friction lies. I see the structural defects that cause energy, money, or stock to leak out of the system.

However, possessing this "Architect" mindset created a problem when I tried to operate as a standard agency owner. Standard agencies are often built on volume. They need to churn through leads, regardless of the product.

But an Architect cannot build a stable structure on a rotten foundation. My subconscious knew that I couldn't optimise a funnel for a product that was damaging the planet. It was a violation of my core operating system.

The High Cost of Misalignment

The "Architect’s Dilemma" is what happens when you try to apply high-integrity skills to low-integrity projects.

In the early days of my consultancy, driven by the very real fear of financial hardship and the need to provide for my family, I tried to widen my reach. I told myself, "Business is business. Just get the cash flow."

But the body keeps the score. Every time I looked at a prospect list filled with generic dropshippers, fast fashion brands, or companies relying on "greenwashing," I felt a physical resistance.

I call these "counter thoughts". I would sit down to draft a cold email, and a voice would whisper: Is this actually helping? Are you just adding to the noise?

This wasn't laziness. It was my values revolting against my strategy.

This misalignment didn't just make me feel bad; it actively damaged my business. It caused me to:

• Accept excuses: I let myself off the hook for not doing business development.

• Hesitate in negotiations: I couldn't sell with conviction because I didn't believe in the client's mission.

• Procrastinate: I filled my days with "busy work" to avoid the real work of selling to people I didn't align with.

I realised that you cannot build a sustainable career on a foundation of cognitive dissonance. If I wanted to survive, let alone thrive, I needed a new strategy.

The Pivot: Ethical Business Alignment as the Solution

The fix wasn't to "toughen up" or learn aggressive sales tactics. The fix was to stop trying to "overcome" my values and start leaning into them.

I decided to pivot my entire approach to focus on Ethical Business Alignment. This meant making a hard rule: I would only work with potential clients whose values aligned with mine.

I began targeting brands in the regenerative economy, the circularity space, and the ethical D2C sector. These are founders who, like me, believe in the "People and Planet" vision.

The moment I made this switch, the "sales fear" vanished.

Why? Because I was no longer trying to sell to a stranger; I was trying to help an ally build a better system. I wasn't trying to trick someone into buying a service they didn't need; I was offering vital infrastructure support to a mission I believed in.

This shift transformed "Sales" into "Service." It turned "Pitching" into "Partnering."

From Diagnosis to Long-Term Collaboration

With this new alignment, my service model had to change too. I realised that ethical founders don't want to be sold "marketing hacks." They want truth.

So, I stopped acting like a salesperson and started acting like a partner.

The Forensic Entry Point

I now lead with a Forensic Diagnosis. Just as I would audit a supply chain for stock loss, I audit a digital business for "profit leaks." I look at the data—the Hook Rates, the Hold Rates, the Funnel Conversion—and I tell the truth about where the system is failing.

I don't do this to make a quick buck on an audit fee. I do this to prove competence. In a world full of snake-oil marketers, data is the only language that builds trust instantly.

The Long-Term Vision

Crucially, the diagnosis is just the beginning. It is not the end of the relationship.

My background as a business owner means I understand that a report alone doesn't fix a business. Execution does.

With the right clients—those where the Ethical Business Alignment is strong—I am looking for long-term collaboration. I want to be the strategic partner who stays in the trenches with them. I want to be the one who not only identifies the structural defect but helps rebuild the architecture so it can hold the weight of their growth.

I am moving from being a "vendor" to being a "Fractional Partner." This is a role where I can bring my full multidisciplinary background to the table—helping not just with ads, but with the holistic user experience and operational reality of the business.

Navigating the Reality of the Niche

I want to be transparent: this pivot is not a magic pill that instantly filled my bank account. I am still in the transition.

By committing to Ethical Business Alignment, I have voluntarily slashed my Total Addressable Market (TAM). I am saying "no" to the easy money of the extractive economy.

The fears are still there. The emotional roller-coaster of "getting the first few clients to get going" is still a daily reality. I haven't landed the "whale" client yet.

But there is a fundamental difference between the stress I feel now and the stress I felt before.

• Before: It was the stress of betrayal, feeling like I was selling my soul to pay the bills.

• Now: It is the stress of construction, the hard work of building something meaningful.

I would rather struggle to build a fortress of integrity than succeed at building a house of cards.

Building for Existential Stability

Ultimately, this journey is about redefining what "success" looks like.

For years, I chased arbitrary revenue numbers because that’s what the industry told me to do. But those numbers were hollow because they weren't built on alignment.

Now, my goal is Existential Stability. I want to build a business that provides enough resources for me to act freely, to speak the truth, and to support the regenerative movement, without compromising who I am.

To my fellow founders who feel stuck: Have you ever felt that your "business block" was actually a "values clash"?

If you are procrastinating, hesitating, or self-sabotaging, look at your client list. Are you trying to build a system for people you don't respect?

The answer might not be better sales scripts. The answer might be Ethical Business Alignment.